By Wendy Woudstra  »  No matter how skeptical or unsupportive of your writing "hobby" your friends and family have been, it seems that they all expect you to provide them with a complimentary copy, cheerfully signed no less, when you finally succeed in getting it published.

While you're probably feeling magnanimous shortly after seeing your words in print, whether it is for the first time or the twenty-first, I would suggest that there are probably better ways to use whatever number of complimentary copies of your book you've received from the publisher than to give them to friends who aren't even likely to read it.

How do you decide who should get a free signed copy and who should be refused? Let's start with the obvious.

Your parents get the first signed copy. Not only do you owe them for your very existence, most parents will be so proud of you they'll bring out your book for every visitor who arrives at the door. Note: this might not apply if you write hard-core erotica.

Next, give a signed copy to any of your friends or family members who have been consistent cheerleaders, helpers or evangelists. Every writer needs friends like these, so be very nice to them.

But what about friends who snicker about your writing, and make not-so-funny jabs about getting a real job? Those who told you that you'll never succeed and urged you to give up and be realistic?

It might feel good to give them a copy, proving them wrong, but you know, deep down, that not only do they not deserve a copy, they'll probably never read it, and if they do skim it, it will be to find mistakes, or something to pick on.

No, don't give them a free copy. If they ask for a copy, tell them if they buy a copy you'll sign it for them. If they're broke and you're feeling flush with cash, offer to buy the book for them.

Nothing will get the point across to them that your work has value as quickly as seeing actual money exchange hands for the product of your labor.

Your books are merchandise. There is no more reason for you to give away copies to anyone who asks than for the grocer to give free vegetables to all his friends.

As for the fee copies you've got left, use them to promote yourself. Give them to local media, send them to potential influencers on the Web that your publisher might not know about, give some copies to your local libraries.

• Wendy Woudstra is a frequent contributor to www.publishingcentral.com, where you can find thousands of book publishing links and articles, including many ways to use those complimentary copies of your books.